In Two and a Half weeks, Elise heads off to the MTC. I have a lot of mixed emotions about this exciting day! Thank you
Jylare for the photos!
So I'll try to sort them out.
1. I'm SO excited for her! The opportunity to FOCUS on service is life changing! It is invaluable and I know the growth and development that will occur because of that so I am thrilled that she is choosing to serve a mission. She will learn to live by the spirit and that will be so important to further develop that ability. She will have time each day dedicated to learning about the gospel. She will be able to love the people she serves, I already know that much.
2. Adventure! Italy! I'm just incredibly thrilled that she gets to experience this incredible country. That she gets to LIVE there, and that she will learn Italian and eat all that amazing food. So many future adventures are swirling in my mind! I'm excited to have her go back with me someday. Just some background, I've always been obsessed with Italy. After taking Spanish and French in High School, I chose to take Italian in college. I love Italy and it was on my bucket list for years. We finally got to go and I loved it so much, but didn't get enough of it so have been researching a trip that included Florence, Cinque Terre, and Venice. Also, back when I was 18, I was laying in bed in Russia thinking about baby names and decided that I really loved the name Milan, and I loved the name Elise. Later, I ditched the name Milan because it seemed too different. But I love the sound of it. And here we are and ELISE is going to be a missionary in MILAN. So cool.
3. I'm a little Jealous! Jealous probably isn't the right word. But I'm so excited for her and I want to go there too! But I know that is not a good idea when she is there. I'm having funny dreams. In one dream, I was accompanying her to the mission home. Apparently they stay the first night there before being assigned to their areas? Maybe I'm wrong but that is what it sounded like. Anyway, my dream after reading through the process was that we got to the mission home and the girls were given a little space of 4ft by 2ft to sleep on the ground and they were packed in there. And I told Elise that wasn't acceptable and she needed to be able to stretch out and so when I complained about it the other missionaries thought she was being a diva. So funny! But apparently my subconscious doesn't want to let go and still wants to mother her.
4. I know letting go is the best thing. Just cut the cord. I know that sometimes as moms we have this irresistible urge to do things for our kids that they can do on their own. I like to insert myself into certain parts of her life even when I know she will learn to do it if I don't. So this separation will be good for both of us and I know it.
5. She gets to learn how to get along with all kinds of people! Companions, investigators, etc. Its a life skill and it can be difficult. But I think she will be easy going and will learn more how to communicate, etc. And hopefully she will clean up after herself.
6. I'm not anxious, but I know we are going to really miss her influence at home. She has a little note on her phone where she regularly updates with funny family quotes. She is the culture keeper of our home. She draws on everyones strengths and is very adept at making everyone feel like a rockstar. And because everyone values her opinion so much and wants to please Elise, this has been a great thing for our family identity. When everyones fighting and having a moment, she reframes it and laughs and points out how funny it all is and somehow we are all laughing too. She's not a bossy, loud, type oldest child. She's a quiet leader with a big presence and we are going to miss that.
But I know she will still be an amazing influence and now the big news is that we can talk to her more often! Missionaries can call home on P-Days now instead of just Mother's Day and Christmas!
7. Everyone has told me sending a child on a mission is a whole lot of emotions, one of which is grief. The separation is hard. But hopefully being able to talk with her more regularly will help with that! I'm not worrying too much about that part, because, what can I do about it? Nothing. I know it is going to be sad. But I'm so excited for her too, so it will be okay! And it really helps that she comes home next year. That sounds easy and doable! Next year. 2020! March to September goes by so fast anyway! Monet will graduate from high school, Miles will be almost driving and dating, and Soren is going to be 8! Wow.
